The Power Beyond Your Thoughts – Part 2 (The Newbie)
I touched vaguely on the primary thought pattern of a new client or beginner in Part 1. Today I’d like to shed some more light on common behavior that I witness in the vast majority of people just entering the beautiful world of change. First of all, what is change? In as much as there are many meanings to this English word such as monetarily (I need change for the parking meter) or perhaps with a inanimate object (I changed my oil) they all come down to this: the act or instance of making or becoming different. Whether it be changing a diaper, changing your clothes, or changing your behavior, it all requires effort. The difference between them though is that the first two are temporary and the latter can last a lifetime and, better still, for the better.
So, now that we have an understanding of what exactly change means, let’s discuss what may need to be altered in order for said change to occur. I find one of the hurdles for so many comes down to habits. Habit of opting out of doing what’s necessary, whether it be something along the line of chores or, ugh, exercising, in order to watch your favorite program on Netflix and eating bonbons. After all, you feel good eating treats and relaxing. It’s a necessity, right? It’s part of your routine, your ‘you’ time. You can do chores or exercise tomorrow. Sure you can,… but will you? Probably not because chances are it’ll be Saturday and your friends are going out. Wouldn’t want to miss that! Friends are important and fun is what living is all about. Right again?? Sunday, you can do it all Sunday. .. or will you? Again, chances are, no. You have a project due or family visiting or, or, or… See the pattern? The bad habit comes down to the word ‘procrastination’. Tomorrow may never come so use today wisely.
I’ll now bring attention to another dreaded word. Blame. It’s easy to point the finger at someone else for your bad habits. ‘I was picked on in school’, ‘My coach never let me play in a game’, ‘The judges don’t like me’, etc, etc. Wtf? Seriously?!? Answer me this: Where are the bullies now? Does your coach not let you play now? Are you sure this is about the judges? Common denominator, my friend, is you. Take ownership of you now! If you didn’t like being picked on, help someone out. If you were never allowed to play in a game, start your own team. If the judges don’t like you maybe it’s about that scowl on your face when you lose. Either way, no one is standing over you saying this is why your failing to you. Believe it or not, your fabricating what happened in your yesterdays as an excuse for your inaction today. Wise up. Quit playing victim and take control of yourself and get rid of the ‘why nots’ and turn them into something way more productive… the ‘why can’t I?’ Because, my dear, you most certainly can!!
Another one, and this I find to be one of the most debilitating of all, is your thinking. By far and large this is the biggest habit of all that I bring light to with my clients. When I ask them why they are not looking in the mirror when they are executing an exercise, more than half reply with ‘because I can’t stand the way I look.’ Ouch! That reflection staring back at you is you!! How can you say that about your own self?? This is definitely a problem. A very big problem. I see day in and day people spending good money on clothes, cars, groceries, make up, hair, nails, you name it. Yet they don’t feel or invest in their own self worth. Most things are replaceable. .. the true reality of it is that you are not! You are your home, your vehicle, your beauty. Why do we search for temporary solutions when this temple that houses you will follow you everywhere… even if you choose not to look at it. I’ll say again, take ownership of you! You’re beautiful in so many ways. Why is it that you can’t see it? It’s largely because of your thoughts. You’re so used to calling yourself down that you have no time to pick yourself up! You are a miracle! You are life! You are mothers and fathers and sisters and brothers to more that just your immediate family. Your someone’s best friend, someone’s example, someone’s love, someone’s idol. Why do you shirk away from looking at something others see as beautiful? If you don’t like what you see, change the way you see it. Simple solution? Yes! Easy to execute, not necessarily.
Your task for today… take one example of your bad habits, your blame and your negative self talk and write them down. Ask yourself how you got there and what you can do to start that cycle of change. No matter how big or small you make the task, it’s a start. You are worth the effort. Until next time…